This is not a test, because we'd fail.

The decision to start our own blog had been in the back of our minds for some time. We just didn't respect readers enough, nor the stigmas behind blogged word to trust that our analytical masterpieces would be nocuous. There's too much waste out there, people talking about their daily boring and mindless lives without giving any thought to the fact that they're uninteresting (unless said person is a celebrity, or Michael Phelps, apparently). No, what people care about most is themselves, and they love hearing ideas that could have been their own. The internet was made for narcissists, and that's where we come in. 

 

The Derelicts are committed to pop culture analysis. That's our credo.

Undoubtedly and inevitably, we may log on in 3 A.M. in the morning and ramble drunkenly about some innocuous detail, but rest assured, we'll label said posts accordingly. Who knows, maybe our clouded thoughts will be even more insightful than our sober ones. With alcohol, there's always hope, unless you're Tom Waits. 

Butch and I will disagree on some topics. But, such is the nature of the self-absorbed. Within our disagreements, we believe you'll find synthesis (what people who "tug it" to politics discover when they watch Fox news while reading NPR blogs). 

All that we ask of you, the reader, is that you learn to take us seriously while simultaneously realizing that we're probably wrong. C'mon, humorous speculation is better than grave dissertation. I realize this sounds like cognitive dissonance (that's because it is), but embracing our style will make the grouped words and sentence clusters on this page slide as smooth as Keystone Ice (smooth even when you're not). 

 

So, Planet Earth, we come to you now, at the turn of the tide . . .

- Mozart